It’s the summer after junior year of high school, and college is the non-stop talk of the town. Fear rages inside of you because you are nervous to leave behind the life that you have built for yourself throughout your last twelve years or so living in your hometown.
As December quickly approaches, your friends, classmates and acquaintances begin to get their college acceptances; your world changes. People are making new so-called “friends” and come to school everyday talking about it. And these “friends” that keep being mentioned to you at the dinner table are probably your cousin’s friend’s wife’s dog. Whether we like to admit it or not, we are all guilty of “glirting” at one point or another.
“Glirting” is a verb used to describe the girls that “girl flirt” before college in order to make friendships online and meet up in person.
The idea sounds better than the reality. People can portray themselves on social media differently by trying to be someone they are not. Also, those who do not live near the vast majority of people attending a college get left out. They either have to fly in to come to these arranged meetups, FaceTime in or just wait to meet people at college. No one wins this game.
Meeting people at college for the first time? What a foreign concept!
The world we are all living in becomes superficial in the sense that everyone wants to be the best version of themselves online. I am guilty of believing these people, and I fell into traps.
Personally, I had tremendous FOMO (fear of missing out) from meetups if I did not attend one. I lived in the tri-state area, so it was not hard to miss them. Looking back now as an incoming college senior, I laugh to myself about the ways I perceived how I needed to make friends. While, yes, I am still best friends with some, but not all, of the people I met through social media, I met so many more in person by being myself. By doing this, I was able to foster stronger relationships.
There is something to be said about the connection you get when you meet a friend for the first time without knowing anything about them. Okay, I cannot lie, I live for matching people up. I set up half of my home friends with their college roommates; some failed, but some did succeed.
Setting people up is one of my favorite activities because if I like them both, I think they will be a good fit for one another. But when I think about it, I only set people up together if I knew them personally, rather than through social media.
Now I’m not saying that meeting “friends” before college is a bad thing, because as I said, I am still best friends with some of the people I met. But I do want to highlight the right mindset people need to have when going into these meetups. They are not the end all be all, and you will meet countless new people once you actually step on campus
At the end of the day, you know yourself better than anyone else. Before glirting occurs, think to yourself, “Is this really what I’m like?” Even ask your friends from home if they agree with how you are portraying yourself.
You only get to go to college once, and you do not want to go into it with the wrong mindset. Be true to yourself, know your character traits and what makes you, you because that is how you will succeed and make your lifelong friends. Basically, don’t come into school with a closed mindset, be open to meeting everyone
Abe Lincoln once said, “Good things come to those who wait,” and this could not be more applicable to the scenario of making friends in college. Do not rush into friendships or roommate decisions just because your home friends have friends and roommates already. Remember that you need to do what is best for you, and it’s important to take your time before rushing into friendships.